Happy New Year! I hope that you all had a wonderful time celebrating and reflecting on 2009 and what you want for 2010. DH and I partied like rockstars... or not, lol. We just stayed home, watched TV, and toasted. DH had a nice glass of champagne and I had a wonderful glass of sparkling cider. Exciting! Honestly though, it was so nice and I wouldn't have wanted to celebrate in any other way. Plus yesterday was the sickest I've felt to date and I don't think I could have done anything outside the house if I tried. I am joyously and blissfully sick and tired. I'm really looking forward to seeing what 2010 has in store for us. The highlight will be the birth of our long awaited bundle of joy and I'm anxious to see what else will happen this year.
The only thing that I'm really stressing about (I'm trying to keep it in check) is that dh is scheduled to deploy to Italy for 6 months about a month after the baby is due. I'm nervous at the prospect of caring for a newborn by myself, but I've also heard that Lupus flares after giving birth are very difficult and I'm scared to face that alone. My closest support system is my brother and his family and they are 3 hours away and have 4 kids of their own. Plus my brother (he's a Marine) is due for orders soon, so I don't even know if he'll be around. I'm trying to not focus on it too much because dh's squadron is pretty family oriented and I think that if I'm not doing well they won't make him go. We'll see. I also think it's important for him to pull his load and fulfill his obigations. After all, if he doesn't go that means someone else's husband has to.
The nursery is officially painted and we started putting up the border today. However, silly us didn't measure beforehand and we don't have enough border to finish. So we need to order some more. Oh well! We have 7 months to go. It looks really cute so far. I'll be sure to put up a picture once we're done with everything.
Everything else is wonderful. I go for another ultrasound on Friday. I don't think that the machine that the Naval Hospital has is very great. I saw Kourtney Kardashian getting her first ultrasound on a re-run today and she definitely got a much better image. Go figure! Does anyone know the average cost if I wanted to go get a private ultrasound? The hospital has a very strict schedule on when they give u/s. For the normal folks you only get one at 10 weeks and one at 20 weeks. Right now, with my issues, I'm getting them every week from my RE, but I don't know how it will be once I graduate.
In other news, school starts again on the 11th. I'm so nervous! This fatigue is kicking my butt! Luckily all of my classes are on-line except for one and I don't think the course load will be too heavy. We'll see! Please wish me luck and send me tons of prayers. So far I have a 4.0 and I really don't want to ruin it.
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas to all! I can't believe how quickly the holiday season has arrived. Where did this year go? I must say that I'm happy to see it go and to experience what 2010 has in store for me. Tomorrow dh and I are heading about 3 hours away to my brothers house. We will be spending the holiday with my brother, his wife, his 4 beautiful kids, and my mom and her husband. My Mom and her husband are in from California visiting. I'm really looking forward to seeing them and I hope that it's a happy, wonderful Christmas.
Growing up we always had BIG family Christmas celebrations with my extended family in Reno. Unfortunately I haven't been able to go to one of those in way too long and hope that it's something I can do soon. I have a fabulous family. On Christmas Eve we would always gather at my aunt's house and have dinner and each open 1 gift and then head to midnight mass. Christmas day would be spent at another one of my aunt's houses and we would have tons of wonderful food and just talk and have so much fun. I miss my family.
What are some of your Christmas traditions or wonderful memories?
Growing up we always had BIG family Christmas celebrations with my extended family in Reno. Unfortunately I haven't been able to go to one of those in way too long and hope that it's something I can do soon. I have a fabulous family. On Christmas Eve we would always gather at my aunt's house and have dinner and each open 1 gift and then head to midnight mass. Christmas day would be spent at another one of my aunt's houses and we would have tons of wonderful food and just talk and have so much fun. I miss my family.
What are some of your Christmas traditions or wonderful memories?
I'm going crazy!
I want more than anything for this to be the happiest time of my life. I've finally been blessed with what I want most in life. Instead I'm allowing myself to get consumed with worry and doubt. Now that I'm finally pregnant I'm so scared that it's going to get taken away. I was so terrified before my first ultrasound that they wouldn't find a baby there and was so sure that after they found everything to be okay I would be comforted. I'm getting another ultrasound on Wednesday and have found myself consumed with the same worries all over again. God blessed me with this gift and I really don't think anything bad is going to happen. I'm going to have this baby full term and completely healthy! Now if only I could be this certain all the time. I don't want to be like this! I want to stand firm and strong in my faith. I don't want to receive a gift from God and then spend the entire time questioning His gift. In addition I have become a habitual pregnancy test addict. I keep POAS to make sure that the lines are still as dark as always. So let me reintroduce myself...
Hello everyone! My name is Jennifer and I'm addicted to pregnancy tests.
Hello everyone! My name is Jennifer and I'm addicted to pregnancy tests.
Progestorone
I forgot to add in my last post that my doctor put me on 200mg of Progesterone inserts three times a day just to be on the safe side. That's been... interesting... so far. Hello pantyliners!
First Ultrasound
Today dh and I went for our first ultrasound! I was so nervous before and had to keep reminding myself that this is a gift from God and that everything is going to be just fine. We got to see the gestational sac, yolk sac, heart beat, and fetal pole. The heart beat wasn't definitive enough yet to count the heart rate, but we're going back for another ultrasound next week. Dh and I are definitely very excited. We are already painting the baby's room this weekend and have ordered a few things for the room as well. This is the theme that we decided to go with. I'm sure that it looks more "boyish" than anything, but girls like animals too, so it's okay.
And here's our little baby. Sorry, the quality is really bad. I'll scan the sonogram pictures in next time. For the first one I went ghetto and just took a picture of it. Sorry!
My RE is going to see me until about 8 weeks or so and then I'll either get transferred to a high risk OB or just a regular one. With my issues it will probably be high risk, but we'll see what they say after I meet with them.
In other news I've always had this area on my right side that is a little bit tender when it's pushed on and lately that's been tender just on its own. I don't know if that's where I have some endo and maybe that's just adjusting with the pregnancy?? I'll have to keep an eye on that and see how it continues to feel.
And here's our little baby. Sorry, the quality is really bad. I'll scan the sonogram pictures in next time. For the first one I went ghetto and just took a picture of it. Sorry!
My RE is going to see me until about 8 weeks or so and then I'll either get transferred to a high risk OB or just a regular one. With my issues it will probably be high risk, but we'll see what they say after I meet with them.In other news I've always had this area on my right side that is a little bit tender when it's pushed on and lately that's been tender just on its own. I don't know if that's where I have some endo and maybe that's just adjusting with the pregnancy?? I'll have to keep an eye on that and see how it continues to feel.
Rheumatologist: Round 2
After finishing my last final (WOOHOO!) of the semester dh and I went to my rheumatology appointment. I was SO nervous! Basically what she said is that a lot of my labs were very high and while she can't say for certain that I have lupus, that is what it looks like and I definitely do have some form of connective tissue disease. She may want to put me on high dose steriods or a medication called Plaquinol. Both of them are okay for pregnancy, but of course still do carry risks. I only want to go on those if ABSOLUTELY necessary. I do have an increased risk for developing placenta blood clots. She set me up with an emergency appointment with a hematologist to see if I have any other blood disorder problems and if there's anything I need to do for my pregnancy. I might have to go on low dose aspirin to prevent blood clots, but that could cause heart damage in the baby.
Honestly I'm not worried about any of these things. I really feel like God has His hand on this situation and that everything's going to be just fine. Of course I have had some worrying thoughts about miscarrying, but I try my hardest to push those thoughts to the side and to just focus on the here and the now and the blessing that God has given me. Other than that I'm just really tired and sick to my stomach. YAY!
Honestly I'm not worried about any of these things. I really feel like God has His hand on this situation and that everything's going to be just fine. Of course I have had some worrying thoughts about miscarrying, but I try my hardest to push those thoughts to the side and to just focus on the here and the now and the blessing that God has given me. Other than that I'm just really tired and sick to my stomach. YAY!
Confirmed!
DH and I woke up early and went to the doctors office as soon as they opened. They sent me for a blood hcg and my pregnancy was confirmed! My number was 1864 and I'm 5-6 weeks pregnant. I'm so excited! I also had my first bout of morning sickness this morning. How crazy is that! I'm going for an ultrasound on Tuesday. I can't believe this is me right now.
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